A Perl Novice...

Thinks CGI and Perl are interchangeable terms.
Still thinks Perl looks like bad C code viewed over a noisy modem.
Is insecure about the concept of dollar signs and at signs.
Thinks Perl should be more like sh or tcl.
Has heard of the ``Unix mindset'', but hopes it's a treatable condition.
Can't figure out how to read input from the keyboard.
Thinks regular expressions are somebody cursing.
Wonders why no one can give him a straight answer about whether Perl is compiled or interpreted.

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YAPC 2000: Stages of a Perl Programmer - 2