MOUNT.BOB.REPORT

Here follows some of my less hazy recollections of the event known as MOUNT.BOB.

Thursday morning at 7:23AM, hopped into a loaded, borrowed van and began a lengthy phase of the trek to MOUNT.BOB. Little did I know....

Thursday evening at about 7:34PM, arrived at the bus station in Oklahoma City, where I was to pick up Johnny Mayall and Barrett Justice. Apparently, the agent working at the bus station took lessons in directions from Boy Mozart, as I was told to turn the wrong way at the base of the exit ramp. Found Johnny and Barrett immediately after entering bus station, being the only two guys that looked like they were going camping. Headed further west.

About 8:30, pulled off into Weatherford, Ok, for dinner. Johnny and Barrett spent their time guessing how long the waitress had been working there (2-3 weeks). Had a good dinner at the City Diner, then headed further west. We later discovered that Barrett had left his sunglasses on the table. Anyway, we made it to Elk City and checked into the Motel 6 for the evening.

Friday, bright and early, checked out and piled into the van for the second leg of the trip. Headed for Amarillo and points northwest. Johnny correctly identified the shape of a small mountain as being that of a volcano. A volcano that came back to haunt us...

Several hours later, we stopped along I25 in Colorado, gaining the opportunity to call 1-800-FLOWERS to make arrangements for brightening the day of Jenines' mother, and getting to see three RV jerks pull off the Interstate, through a one-lane underpass (blocking us), and then circling back through the underpass without stopping. A prime example of retirement senility. After the RV bozos got out of the way, we proceeded to THE SITE. In spite of incorrect directions.

Thanks to the extra driving the night before and the early start, we were able to arrive at THE SITE about 4:00PM, being welcomed by the hordes of people eager to get at all the stuff in the van. After a few words of greeting, mountains of equipment were unloaded from the van and quickly added to the MOUNT.BOB facilities. The Burger Bash proceeded soon after, and all were well fed and tented.

Due to infirmities related to advanced age, I went to bed about 12:30 Central (11:30 Mountain) after renewing several accquaintenances made at HOTT.BOB.

Saturday morning, awoke to the sounds of breakfast, so bailed out of the tent and participated. The cast iron collection came in handy in the preparation of many pancakes, hashbrowns, and bacon. Got into some trouble with some .BOBbers for using some bacon grease in the second batch of hashbrowns. Wish someone had told me I was supposed to be cooking vegetarian potatos. My apologies to the vegan/vegetarians, as the action was unintentional. Jenine saw to it that everyone had an ample supply of melons.

Somewhere in there, I think we made home fries from baked potatos left over from the Burger Bash. My memories are a bit hazy.

Saturday, hung around THE SITE and tried to shuffle some of the food preparation area equipment to make it easier to cook without getting in the way of socializing around the campfire. Partial success at that.

Saturday night, went to dinner at a nice Italian restaurant and had a good time as well as a good meal. Much pleasant conversation around the table throughout the evening as the wait staff ran their tails off.

Sunday morning, again hopped up to participate in breakfast preparation. We had more melons available, leading to suggestions that the .BOB be renamed as the "Melon Overdose Under Nice Trees".BOB. Finished breakfast and some cleanup about 10:30 (Mountain), and proceeded to participate in Ilana Sterns' rock climbing expedition. Shortly afterward, proceeded to the expedition itself, with sixteen other people. After getting top ropes rigged, many people were introduced to the joys of rock climbing with the assistance of Ilanas' husband. Had to shut down the rock climbing due to the threat of thunderstorms, and went back to camp, just in time for the...

...Chili Cookoff. Unfairly annoyed Corprew Reed for having used my cookpot, made arrangements with Gooley to use another one. So much Chili has not been prepared at a .BOB before, nor have we had so much excess to discard. Should not have made the batch of generic stuff--there was far too much real chili to go around. After eating, proceeded to sit around while others cleaned up. (Corprew, I wasn't really mad at you, I'm just not good at being facitious.)

Later, attended the play instead of making last minute preparations for a fire for the closing scene. Some of the script adaptations were quite well done, including JKCohens' audience response. All apparently enjoyed the play greatly.

Again, advanced age and the expectation of a 12-hour drive the following day necessitated an early trip to bed.

Monday morning, started rounding up the mountain of equipment to re-pack the van, expecting a relatively early departure. When it turned out that the schedule had changed, helped with more breakfast preparation followed by assisting in camp teardown. Finally departed with reluctance about 10:30 (Mountain time).

Returning through New Mexico, stopped at the Capulin Volcano National Monument. After all, being t.b'ers, we couldn't pass up the opportunity to examine the final resting place of large numbers of cave newts. Spent about a half hour, which caused problems later. However, the immediate concern wat GNATS.

Note that there are gnats, nats, and THOSE DAMN CAPULIN GNATS. Hundreds of TDCGs, flocking around us, and as a result of me foolishly leaving the van door open while taking a few pictures, a few hundred invading the van. We spend the majority of the afternoon evicting the stealth ninja Capulin gnats from the van. Every few miles, we opened the windows and flicked six or eight TDCGs at a time into the void. We still had some in Oklahoma City. I evicted one near Little Rock, probably the furthest a TDCG has ever traveled from its' home crater.

Speaking of Oklahoma City. The schedule called for me to deliver Johnny and Barrett to the bus station in time for a 12:30 bus. We foolishly though we had plenty of time. We foolishly stopped in Weatherford again, so Barret could check on his sunglasses--which were locked in the safe-- and ate at the McDonalds, spending 20 minutes there. Then, we hit a nasty thunderstorm that delayed us more (even the truckers were slowing down to 40). Not to be outdone, we hit construction and got stuck behind someone that couldn't do over 45 in a 60 zone thorough it. The end result was a hard push for the last hour or so into Oklahoma City in order to miss our exit. Finally got Johnny and Barrett to the bus station with 18 minutes to spare. (Then, of course, Greyhound misplaced their luggage and shipped it to the wrong station.) After departure noises, headed east to Shawnee and another Motel 6.

This Motel 6 didn't live up to the others. The cold water was about 90F, the floor of the bathroom had damage, and the wakeup call didn't happen. As a result, I was over an hour late getting started...

Tuesday morning. Got up, headed east, and cruised to Sallisaw, Ok. where I finally hit a tourist trap for a gift supply. After that, stopped again in Memphis for fuel and checked an alternate route to Huntsville. (May have discovered a better way; will try next time.) Finally arrived home about 8:00PM, after about 12 hours of driving. Petted beagles for a few minutes, then started unloading and hanging up the tents to dry. (Garage is currently impassible.) Finally got to bed about 12:00, as I had to work Wednesday.

Didn't expect Wednesday to last until 11:30, but it's actually convenient in a couple of ways.

I had a good time, and renewed my respect for .BOB organizers. Jenine, you did a *wonderful* job. Kudos, compliments, etc. are just not adequate. Thank you.

Gary

--
Gary Heston gheston@ro.com spamfodder: root@localhost president@whitehouse.gov sync@localhost daemon@localhost lp@localhost mail@localhost news@localhost If Microsoft sold houses: "You say the bathroom light isn't on? Try flipping the light switch up, and if that doesn't work, bulldoze and rebuild your house."