The Book of Not: The Book of the Blue Plymouth: Guns, Sex, Drugs, and Action

Mikey went down the road and heard tons of bad 70's music which made him think of really piss-poor action movies. Someone's gonna have to come up with a parody of that sometime. But for now, it'll do. They swore a lot... all the bums that, is. 'Cause that's exactly what bums do...they swear...and they use other people's money to have a good time.

That's what Mikey thought anyway. of course, it could have bee Utah, he wasn't really sure of that one.

He found his way to Bruce's house, where Bruce was pulverizing this white stuff into tiny little bits and then putting it on mirrors so that it looked *really* formidable and oh-so-chic when the $10,000 bills came out and got rolled up into little tubes of semi-counterfeit straws.

"Sniff, retard!", commanded Bruce with much fury. And they did...all of those that weren't interested in finding out what it means to be dead in 2 seconds.

Mikey walked in the door. "Hi! Bruce! You haven't showed up for any of the holidays or birthdays or get-togethers or bar-b-q's or Superbowls or bad parlor games or ..."

"Shut up, Mikey...you're givin' these retards a headache."

"It looks like they're doing that fine without me, Bruce."

"Shut up...just SHUT THE FUCK UP, MIKEY! I don't need this kind treatment from you or anyone else...not you...not Dad...not NO ONE, you hear me...NO ONE! I'm a rebel, Mikey...a loner. You don;t wanna get tangled up with a guy like me, Mikey. I have to do this ALONE."

There was quite a bit of reverb on his last line, it had impressed Mikey beyond comprehension...he didn't even try to fathom it's inky black abyssal qualities.

"That was cool, Bruce. Do it again."

"No..I better not..it hurts the throat. Do you have a medicated throat lozenge? I'm gonna need it."

"No, but I do have this neat looking piece of ivory that looks something like a STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION communicator pin.", as Mikey produced the shard from his purple fez.

"Say, that's pretty cool looking, a couple holes here and there and it'll look just something quintessential and cliche."

"Yeah, Bruce...that's just what I was thinking, too.", dripped Mikey's sarcasm.

"Nice fez, Mikey. See you later."

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This page's content authored by: Ryan J. Smart [smart@tuxedo.enet.dec.com]