Pranklympics: Part the Re(e)d Sea

313. Dominate a House Representative into giving a speech supporting the Civil Lefts Amendment. If you have a conscience, keep him from killing himself later.

314. (Need Auspex or blind fighting to do this one. Well, it makes things easier, anyway...) Throw on a sleeveless green dress with a rope for a belt. Put on a blindfold. Grab some scales and a sword and visit the OJ Trial. (Bonus points for braining that annoying weasel Shapiro with the scales.)

315. (Need to be really good at Fleshcrafting for this one...) Go buy a bunch of gerbils or hamsters. Suffocate them all. Now turn them into miniature wolves. Stuff 'em all into a sack with a note saying: "You're next, furbutts. Love, The Tremere.". Now go toss the sack where you know a lupine will get it.

316. Find a deer lease and hunt hunters with some paintball guns. (Bonus points if you can get them to shoot back.) Now track a deer and kill it. Superglue the paintball gun to its hooves and leave it where you know a hunter will find it.

317. Once more at the deer lease, track and capture some deer. (Don't hurt 'em this time.) Now spray-paint a camouflage pattern on them with neon orange and yellow spray-paint.

318. (This one requires telepathy and skilled users of Obfuscate...) Have the telepath secretly follow a hunter. Have the other vampire follow a deer that the hunter is tracking. Now, once the hunter raises the rifle to aim at the unsuspecting deer, the telepath gives the mental signal to the other vampire, who Obfuscates the deer. Now, while the hunter is confused, have the telepath use Mask of a Thousand Faces to look like a deer and tap him on the shoulder...

319. Find a 'great white hunter' who hunts only for the sheer pleasure of drilling Thumper. Catch him, kill 'im, gut 'im, and clean 'im. Now go tie him to his hood, put on a deer suit, and try driving out of the hunting park.

320. Find some loony who claims to hear voices speak to him. Using Obfuscate and patience, give him some real voices and some direction in his life. He always did want to burn down that secluded, spooky mansion that attracted a lot of people at night, right?

321. Make a bunch of little flags with a cracked mirror on them (nice, eh?). Whenever you go someplace (especially where the Prince or Primogen members are), stick a flag wherever you are (in a table, in the ground, in a sofa, etc.) and declare it your personal domain. Demand vampires to 'present' themselves if they get within five feet of your flag. Call bloodhunts against intruding animals. Try and make an extradition treaty with the real Prince when the little buggers flee your domain. Give progeny rights to inanimate objects and unsuspecting passers-by. Carry a folding chair with you and call it your throne. Keep this up until everyone gets used to it. Now wait until someone places a hand on your shoulder. Very quickly ram a flag into the hand, scream out a bloodhunt against the attempted assassin-hand, cut it off swiftly, and run away while eating the appendage whole. On the next night, superglue all your flags to a cat and claim that it deposed you in physical combat.

-Peg Leg Pete, never one to quit while ahead... never one to be ahead...

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