881. Sneak into a liquor store. Put Ozarka Spring Water in all the vodka bottles.

882. Go muddin'. In a souped-up bulldozer. (Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!) In the Prince's house.

883. Find a city election. Replace the worker who checks voter ID cards. "Suggest" to everyone that they write in your favorite candidate. Feign surprise when the Prince is elected mayor.

884. Rob a jewelry store. Try and sell the merchandise back to them the next night at cheap rates.

885. Obfuscate and give a "hot foot" to a Tremere during a ritual. Somewhere around the word "Niktu" is usually good.

886. Find a Gangrel who frenzies a lot. And enjoys showing off his feline features. Nab 'im one night and fleshcraft all of his kitty features into rodent ones.

887. Dominate some cowboys into riding into a bar on horses, lassoing a certain Brujah, and hog-tying him with duct tape. Obfuscate and watch the show with a camcorder.

889. Follow some boyscouts on a weekend camping trip. While Obfuscated, sneak a bunch of marijuana into their camp fire.

890. Sneak into an Italian restaurant. Find the sauce pot and replace the mushrooms with 'shrooms.

891. Find one vampire who maintains a mortal life. Now go cut off one of his hands and run like hell. One night, go shoot the police commissioner and use the hand to leave fingerprints all over the gun and the crime scene. Go tip off the donut-boys.

892. Get on an airplane. Now (using Mask of a 1000 Faces), go to the bathroom every ten minutes and come out as someone completely different. Bonus points if the passenger next to you checks into a loony bin upon landing.

893. Give noogies. With a pumice stone.

894. Switch a Tzimisce's homeland dirt with cow manure.

895. File an extra income tax return for that local Giovanni entrepreneur. Be a good citizen and make sure those audits are thorough. Helping out by returning the Gios 'misplaced' receipts is optional.

896. Spray-paint a horse white and ride it nekkid past a Catholic church for a while. Keep leading any spectators back to the Tremere chantry.

897. With bonecraft, give that aspiring Baali some real horns.

898. Give the local Salubri a few extra eyes to help camouflage it from those pesky Tremere.

899. Dominate a local history professor into teaching the Book of Nod. Bonus points to the one who can do this the longest without getting discovered.

900. Learn Vic... ummm... learn Fleshcrafting and open a lucrative plastic surgery practice.

901. Follow a couple on a vacation. Make sure to be Obfuscated in each photo (naked is optional).

902. Using Dementate, drive everyone in a loony bin into sanity.

903. Give that aspiring Toreador artiste a hand before his upcoming show. Lop off an ear and superglue a fake goatee to him. Dominate him into thinking everything is normal.

904. Combining Horrid Form and Obfuscate, follow a live news team around and make cameos. Holding a sign stating "Price _______ molests cows" is, as usual, optional.

905. Attend sporting events with a high-powered sniper rifle and a prejudice against blimps. (No, no, not fat people...)

906. Fleshcrafting. Involuntary breast enlargement on males.

907. Carry around a Shop-Vac when visiting that clever Gangrel who likes Mist Form so much.

908. Requires 1 person, a tall building with 2 lifts. (That's an elevator for us uncultured Americans.) Have some-one occupy a lift, set up a working shower in there and have someone start taking a shower (complete with shower gap). When the lift is summoned and the doors open, the surprised occupant screams, attempts to cover himself up (it was a man who did it) and quickly press the button to close the doors... After an hour or so, someone can arrive in the lobby wearing just a bath robe, carrying some soap, a bath sponge or whatever. When the lift arrives, the occupant can leave having fully showered and the new person can go in... (Oh, the second lift is so that people can actually move about while the guy is showering.)

909. Ghoul roaches and put them in the Prince's have. Then, when the Prince wipes them out, you use ghouled fleshcrafted mice. It'll take 'im longer to wipe those out, so you have time to prepare the rat-based roaches. Then you go to cats, dogs, and, finally, kine. After he wipes out the last giant roach infestation, you Dominate his fave ghoul into dropping one down his shirt.

910. Dominate an entire high school faculty into going to work naked. Selling disposable cameras to a few students is of course optional.

911. This may take some work. Use Dominate to get nude pictures of the city mayor, then the governor, then the state senators. Place massively blown up pictures on billboards with a new one each month in a different place. Laugh at the headlines.

912. As above but start with the junior members of the Primogen and ending with the prince. Bonus points for any one who survives for more than three showings.

913. Have your ghouls go cow tipping on the Prince's lawn during the day. You'll probably have to supply your own cows.

914. Have your ghouls go clown tipping on the Prince's lawn during the day. You'll definitely have to supply your own clowns. Making them stay tipped is a problem too. I like sledgehammers. Imagine the Prince's face when he wakes up to a yard full of dead clowns. Bonus points for anyone that can get the police to arrive at sunset. Funfunfun.

915. You might want to try playing musical chairs at any important meeting.

916. Whenever dealing with Tremere, watch carefully for any unusual type of dress, like, say a blue ribbon around the neck. Then, start wearing the same thing around them. If asked, deny you started doing anything different. Keep it up for a while. Always eye them suspiciously. After about a month of this, start carrying something that looks like a LOT like a stake, wrapped in tissue paper. Only when you are around them. Always eye them suspiciously. Then, one day, show up on their doorstep with the tissue paper wrapped thing and unwrap it in front of them. Pull out flowers and offer them as a symbol of your love. From then on follow them around like a puppy. Never leave them alone again.

917. Go into a drive through backwards, order money at the speaker. "I would like to get two dollars. I'll be paying with a Big Mac." (Of course they will think you are ordering a big mac.) When you drive up to the window ask for you money, when they don't give it to you throw bologna at them.

918. In New Orleans drive a Marte Grads Float around following the prince all the way up to the Prince's house. (They love this.)

919. Drive a psychiatrist to insanity, despair and ultimately suicide. (Bonus points for shortest time between deaths, huge extra bonus points for getting a psychiatrist to drive his psychiatrist to despairing suicide.)

920. Steal a Ravnos. Literally.

921. Send all of the Primogens a parcel to their meeting this week. Inside they will each receive pictures of themselves and other local Kindred in the most obscene pictures (all computer aided of course) and a ransom note saying I know what you all are doing and to keep me quiet I want 10,000 dollars or I will release the video tape to the press and police with a complete description of their actions.

922. Purchase Dracula cape and plastic teeth. Wearing these, and without using Disciplines, see how many people you can convince that you are a vampire. Children count half. Other Kindred count double.

923. Get a few friends. Dress up as an old style chain gang. Make lots of rubble. Start with city hall to the Prince's house.

924. Take a few antacids, Drink a bit of water, Eat a lot of live goldfish very shortly before a meeting. Walk in with a fishbowl filled with water. Introduce everyone to your new pets by inducing vomiting.

925. Threaten someone that you are going to "rearrange their face". Use fleshcraft to do so.

926. Call everyone mommy. Everyone. Even yourself.

927. Go to a few libraries and rearrange all the books, remembering that they do not have to go in the library where you found them.

928. Take a very strong magnet (the kind used to spin radar dishes is small enough and powerful enough to use effectively) Go to one of those new businesses that stores "safe" backups for other area businesses. Erase everything. Be sure to destroy the originals first.

929. Fake Touret's syndrome for a while. Tell the prince what you think of him.

930. Fake a new accent every day, have handy stories to maintain you really are from that location. Maim all who do not believe you.

931. Dig up Elvis and, using strings, give him one last performance in Las Vegas. Sing the songs yourself, and do not make any attempt to sound like Elvis at all.

932. One night, go around the city and kill the pet's of everyone you find walking a dog. Dominate them into walking the dog around until they drop from exhaustion, singing the song "Dead Puppies Aren't Much Fun". Explain to them this is very important, and anyone trying to stop them must be killed.

933. Dominate a Samedi into walking around a medical convention. Scream "I did it! I did it! He's Alive!" and just disappear, leaving the poor soul there.

934. (You must live (exist in a state of deadness?) in a rural place for this one.) Dominate a Ventrue. Use him to castrate all prime breeding thoroughbred horses near you. (BITE ) Maybe have him/her swallow all the testes so they vomit them up later. Release him/her. Make sure they know they were drinking the blood from horse testes.

935. Get mugged. Refuse to submit. Refuse to lower yourself to violence. Refuse to allow the mugger(s) to in any way impinge on your rights, freedom or actions.

936. Collect muggers. Tie them all together. Put the whole bundle (conscious) in the Police Station's parking lot.

937. Opening scenes of The Terminator. Let one of every Nth gang get away, naked of course. Whether they're all the same size or have a vast range of sizes in up to the prankster.

938. Addams Family: "Is it made with real lemons? ... I'll buy some of your lemonade if you'll buy some of my girl scout cookies." "Are they made with real girl scouts?" (Need I say more?)

939. Use fish instead of gambling chips. Insist the currencies are non- interchangeable.

940. Listen to Tom Lehrer's "Be prepared." Demonstrate. Female friend for last few lines recommended.

941. Fleshcraft Pamela Anderson to look like Cindy Crawford. Fleshcraft Cindy Crawford to look like Michelle Pfeiffer. Fleshcraft Michelle Pfeiffer to look like Claudia Schiffer ...

942. Fleshcraft a load of junior high kids to look like whoever's in all their posters ... mixed school or single-sex, your choice.

943. Silicone breast-enhancement. Fleshcraft. Oops.

944. Fleshcraft both members of a sleeping couple to look like other people. Give them memories of some orgy or something. Recording the conversation optional.

945. Find a fox-hunt. Arm yourself and mount up. Destroy the vicious murdering creatures... shotgun for the hounds, lance and saber for the riders.

946. Fish. Is it possible to replace every syllable in someone's vocabulary with "Fish," and would s/he still make sense?

947. Track down and kill all but one member of the casts of as many TV shows as possible. Creativeness in dealing with Forever Knight and K:tE scores extra.

948. Dominate a totally sober man into being totally drunk. Tail him until the police pull him over. Marketing a new breathalyzer is a nice embellishment.

949. LARP sites and clubs sometimes give points for role-playing skill. Help a few of the less willing to overcome their reluctance in this matter. Even better, help the entire party. What you do to the "monsters" is up to you...

950. Fleshcraft a man to look like Cindy Crawford, but leave his You-know-what on. Dominate him into believing he really is a woman, a very horny woman. Send him to a single's bar. Watch and wait.

951. Go to the top of the Empire state building. see if dropping quarters on people really does kill them. Substitute people for quarters if it's not working

952. Septic system, air compressor, Prince's pool.

953. Make a drum set out of the guys from Poison using Vissectitude. Think John Bohnam.

954. Drano, food coloring, blood bank

955. Shave a Garou and turn him into a ghoul. Drop him in the middle of a Gangrel meeting.

956. Get a pure silver pie tin filled it with crazy glue and put some whipped cream on top. Then go over to the nearest Garou and ask if he wants pie. Don;t let your generosity be denied.

957. Know that annoying Toreador Primogen? Crazy glue his butt cheeks together, while at the same time having a charity auction at his haven (auction off all his belongings and haven of course) to benefit a Garou backed charity.

958. Bored with being the Prince of a city that doesn't appreciate your management talents? Fire your Primogen. Hire replacements from a temp agency.

959. If another Cainite decides to try and oust you, begin campaigning to stay in office. Put flyers around the city saying "Vote for [insert name here] for Prince of the City!". Make grandiose champagne promises. Resort to slanderous TV ads only at last resort.

960. Fast-food trick: ask for a Big Mac with no lettuce, no cheese, no sauce, no pickles, no onions, no bun and no meat. Pay for the burger and leave.

961. Start by removing a door from inside the house (the prince's of course). Then Obfuscate, and leave to get a replacement door. Installing the new door in place of the old, de-activate Obfuscate. Now try walking through the solid door. When someone asks what you're doing, tell them that you imagined the door into existence, but can't make it go away, or exercise any control over it; it behaves like a REAL door.

962. Find out the route of the torch runner through your area. One well placed water balloon should do the trick nicely. Watch the fun as they must get a special flame to relight the torch. Keep doing it for as long as you can.

963. Get a friend to help you with this one. Obfuscate to like the Torch bearer and have your friend obfuscate the real runner invisible. Take everyone on your own more exciting route instead of that boring one through the city! The possibilities abound.

964. "Fix" the main torch at the games site so that no matter what, it won't light. Watch the fun abound.

965. Find a pedestrian-only section of street with lots of shops along it, surrounded by tall buildings (Sydney's Pitt St Mall and New York's Rockefeller Center come to mind...). In the middle of late-night shopping, basejump from one of the buildings into the crowd (sans parachute, of course...). Lay in a crumpled and bloody heap for a few seconds, heal up and ask everyone for a sticking plaster.

966. Find the local Prince's haven and put a 'Moose Crossing' sign on either side of the road out front. Then fill an 8'-tall inflatable moose with cement and leave it on the road. Works best where mooses aren't exactly thick on the ground (like Beijing). Wait for the look on the Prince's face when injured moose-victims stagger to his front door to use the phone and police and media turn up to interview him (esp. if he is Lasombra). Bonus points if attempted in Greenwich Village, and it causes a mystery cult to start up (Hermetic Order of the Cement Moose -- has a distinct Tremere ring to it.)

967. Make bullets with a small piece of pork in them. Then go and shot Muslims in the arm/leg and tell them they're going to hell.

968. Get some plastic fangs--the really cheap and fake looking kind. One night, find a lone pedestrian on a deserted street. Put on the fangs, sneak up on them, and bite them on the neck. When they scream, hold up your hands in disalarm. Take out the fangs, hand them to them. Then smile at them with your real teeth and obfuscate.

969. [Ed. Note: Very long prank.] First, you go to your local pet store and buy 6 ferrets (or go to the zoo and get real weasels). then you take them home and you sedate them. Next go to you local mini mall and pick up the rest of the supplies:
-electric hair clippers
-spray paint (assorted colors)
-a beret (the French-type hat)
-body piercing gun (studs and rings as well)
-super glue
-paint brush
-large strike-anywhere match
-gold underwear (weasel sized)
-business suit jacket and tie (weasel sized)
-magician's top hat and bow tie (also weasel-sized.)
-lumber jacket (weasel sized again)
-large pair of scissors
-large u.p.s. box
-six pencils
-ball of string
-envelope with overseas stamps
-pen
-cards (blank greeting type)
-old magazines/newspapers

Go home. Take the first weasel and shave most of its hair off. No need to be too careful. Take the spray paint and paint it assorted pukey colors. Set it aside. Take the next weasel and shave its hair into a mohawk, pierce it ears, nose, genitals etc. spray paint a big "a" in a circle on its back and then set it aside. With the third weasel spray paint both its front paws and super glue the paint brush to one and glue the beret to it head. Put it with the other two finished ones. Take the next weasel, put the business jacket , tie and the gold underwear on it and set aside. Next weasel: place lumber jacket on it and set aside. Now with the last weasel cut off its balls with the scissors and place them in the envelope. address it "Council of Seven, Vienna". Lick envelope closed and place in mail box. go back home. Glue top hat on head of butchered weasel and glue match to its front paw. Place bow tie around neck and use the spray paint to draw an archaic symbol on the weasel's face.

Embrace each weasel one at a time and immediately stake each one with a pencil (they'll be pissed so don't let them get away). Place staked weasels in UPS box and glue tops of pencils to top of box. If box is too big, glue string to pencils then top of box. Now, make up some little notes stating "the weasels are coming" (use ransom note style- cut-out letters so they won't know your handwriting) and send them to random members of your Camarilla. Now go dominate some hapless UPS guy into delivering the package in the middle of next court. Add extra paperwork just to piss off the prince. Make sure to make the return address the Tremere chantry (or blame any clan you don't like). When the prince or other important omnipotent being opens the box, thus unstaking the weasels, they will fly out of the box thirsty for blood. You have now introduced some good old-fashioned fun and chaos into an otherwise stuffy and dull court. When asked who is responsible, respond adamantly that the fairies did it. You may also want to dominate or otherwise convince some others to agree with you.

970. Embrace a Jehovah's Witness. Now Dominate the memory of the embrace away and keep him at his old job. Rather fanatically.

971. Go to a local hospital, find someone in a full body cast or traction. Dominate them and tell them that when the clock strikes a certain time, they are to get up and dance! They can not stop until they have danced. Should make the nurses job a bit more fun.

972. While you're in the Hospital, stroll down to the ICU burn unit. Replace all the sterile water they use on burn victims to clean away the dead skin and the burns with rubbing alcohol.

973. Go to the airport. You know those nice bright flashing lights they have on the poles at the end of the airport boundaries? Steal two of them. Go home, get a car battery or two. Wire the lights to a trigger switch. Make a harness to wear the lights on your body and buy an exceptionally large trench coat. Obfuscate to look normal. Set the trigger switch to set off the lights at full intensity when you open your trench coat. Now go give a new meaning to "Flashing".

974. A high level of scrounging is needed for this one. Having trouble with those pesky Tremere? Well, find out where the chantry is and when they're having the big Annual Bake sale and Magic show. Get aerial photographs of the location. Sneak out of town to a nearby city (in this case, since the game was set in NYC, the prankster went to Boston). Now using you scrounging abilities, find a 747 or some plane that makes a shuttle run back to your home city (You know NY to Boston once on the hour..) (By the way level 4 scrounging says you can find a 747 on an hour's notice). Find the one plane that will be landing about 30 minutes after sunrise and get the Captains name. Go find him and dominate him to bring the rest of the crew to you one at a time. Dominate all of them to your will. Mesmerize the cockpit crew to have "engine trouble" within range near the chantry location and to make sure that all of the readings will be consistent with engine failure (after all, the black box is recording this!!). Instruct them to time things right so as to crash the plane right on the chantry location. Oh yes, be sure to dominate them into forgetting what you look like (better safe than sorry). Sit back and watch the show. No more Tremere problem. It is strongly recommended that you have a ghoul or your sire look like you and be seen about the town that night, just to be safe.

975. Only for the truly reckless. Go to the airport and try to sneak through the metal detector with an M60,.50 caliber machine gun. Try to get it through without Obfuscate. Convince security it's your video camera and that you're a combat photographer on assignment. Use dominate as a last resort. See how far you can get. Bonus points if you actually get on the plane.

976. Bring your own cannon (or similar weapon) to a performance of the 1812 Overture.

977. Find a Bible Studies Class in a Christian school, dominate the teacher into praising the merits of: The Necronomicon, Crowley's Book Of The Law, The Delicate Maul of Bright Shadows, you get the idea. Bonus Points if you can get the Pope to do this.

978. Walk into a House of Mirrors, cover your eyes, set off a flare.

979. Find a white male member of the Inquisition and tip him off about "a vile undead posing as a prominent Rabbi." Make sure there's at least one video camera on hand.

980. Dominate a Tremere into telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, stake her and leave her on the doorstep of an Arcanum Chapterhouse.

981. Play bagpipe solos in your local library.

982. This one requires Obfuscate and lots Vicissitude. Find a movie theatre, turn invisible and stand in front of a screen showing a horror movie. Assume the Horrid Form. At an appropriate moment, appear and start chasing the audience.

983. Throw chickens into a mosh pit.

984. Use Mask Of A Thousand Faces or Fleshcraft to make yourself look like the Prince. Suck helium and give orders.

985. Find a shopping mall with a large fountain. Drop some Cesium in it and run.

986. Mow as many lawns as possible and fill the princes haven with grass clippings. If possible, include a cow, goat, or other grazing animal.

987. Hire a Mariachi band for the next Toreador Social.

988. Make a ghoul goldfish and take it for a walk. (With thanks to my friend Cloak, check out his pages: Winterholm and Autumn Glen)

989. Find a popular priest (the religion doesn't matter) and use Dementation on him/her just before a sermon.

990. Enlist the aid of someone with Animalism. Send a flock of Parrots to disrupt a music festival.

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